It’s that timmmee of yeearrr! Cue the 24/7 holiday music, mass shopping sales, baking extravaganzas and hordes of family members. The best right?
While some of us may delight in the rush of the holiday season, there are definitely some of us who cringe when we see the tinsel come out. We stress over finding the right gifts, dread being bombarded by family we haven’t seen all year and worry that we’ll disappoint people if we don’t keep up the “holiday spirit.” In fact, more than 88% of Americans feel that the holiday season is the most stressful time of year (Study Finds.)
So what can you do if this all sounds a little too familiar?
First, take a deep breath. Second, remind yourself that the holidays are here for you to enjoy too. Third? Keep reading!
Anxiety Inducing Holiday Family Gatherings
For some, when it’s time for holiday parties and family dinners, our anxiety goes through the roof. Being around that many family members can become overwhelming, especially when they ask invasive questions like “Are you dating? Did you get a new promotion yet? Have you gained weight?” Sometimes it feels as if people lose all sense of privacy!
Maybe you’re not necessarily afraid of the nosey Nancys, but you are dreading seeing family members you don’t want to see. Perhaps it’s that one uncle that makes you feel uncomfortable, or your cousin’s kids that are just super frickin’ annoying. Whatever the case, you don’t have to let your fears and anxiety ruin the festivities.
Anxiety Inducing Holiday Family Gatherings
For some, when it’s time for holiday parties and family dinners, our anxiety goes through the roof. Being around that many family members can become overwhelming, especially when they ask invasive questions like “Are you dating? Did you get a new promotion yet? Have you gained weight?” Sometimes it feels as if people lose all sense of privacy!
Maybe you’re not necessarily afraid of the nosey Nancys, but you are dreading seeing family members you don’t want to see. Perhaps it’s that one uncle that makes you feel uncomfortable, or your cousin’s kids that are just super frickin’ annoying. Whatever the case, you don’t have to let your fears and anxiety ruin the festivities.
Healthy Boundaries = Happy Holidays
Believe it or not, you’re in control this season. The best thing you can do for yourself to relieve some anxiety is to acknowledge your feelings.
Be true to yourself and recognize that these family gatherings create more stress for you than joy and identify who or what exactly makes you uncomfortable. If it’s a certain person, you don’t have to talk to them. Find other family members to celebrate with, or even friends. Set up healthy boundaries that keep you happy and keep the peace.
You can set boundaries by:
- Knowing your limits
- Knowing your needs
- Staying calm and collected, and removing yourself from situations when you feel like you’re going to “burst”
- Communicating said boundaries
- And being realistic when it comes to possible pushback.
If you struggle with setting boundaries and are still plagued by the thought that you have to please everyone, reach out to a mental health professional like me! It’s our job to help you know your limits and when it’s ok to say “no.”
Perfectionism and Presents
Another common stress around the holidays is shopping for that perfect gift. Especially for perfectionists, gift giving can become a thing of nightmares. Maybe you have 15+ people on your list of people to buy for and you’re absolutely determined to find the gift that fits them perfectly. You spend hours scouring the web and walking the malls searching for the right gift. And yet, every year, you feel financially pressured and overwhelmed with the sense that you may disappoint someone.
Here’s a secret: it’s the thought that counts!
Really, as corny as the saying is, simply the time and energy you invest in thinking about someone’s needs and wants is enough. A true friend or loved one will recognize this.
Other tips to help manage your anxiety around gift giving include:
- Setting a budget for yourself and sticking to it
- Making a list of those most important to you to buy/make gifts for
- Recognizing that your resources, both time and money, are limited
- Forgiving yourself when you don’t think you find that “perfect” gift
Tips for Preparing for a Stress Free Holiday
Holiday stress is no joke. We talked about some of the heavy hitters, but it never hurts to leave you with a few more tips to beat holiday anxiety.
- Set your expectations. The holidays are busy, crazy and well, imperfect. That’s just how it is! It’s good to recognize this, and prep yourself for some anxiety.
- Take breaks. When planning shopping, events and whatever else you have scheduled for the season, make sure to take out some time for yourself too!
- Practice gratitude. Take the time to recognize the little things that make you happy. Maybe it’s the smell of cinnamon as you go to the grocery store, the phone call from your friend, or the beautiful weather.
- Maintain a bit of routine. Sometimes the holidays stress us out because our everyday routines go out the window. Make sure you keep some of your good habits to stay grounded.
Therapy for Anxiety in Fort Lauderdale, FL
Anxiety disorders and the stressful times of the holidays can become a perfect storm, but know that you don’t have to weather it on your own. You deserve to enjoy your holiday plans by setting healthy boundaries. As a therapist who specializes in perfectionism and anxiety, I’m here to help you see the holiday season not as a threat, but as time to enjoy yourself!
You Know That Nagging, Voice of Self-Doubt in Your Head? Tell It to Shut Up.
With therapy for anxiety, self esteem, or migraines, I can help you build an arsenal of tools you can use to achieve the life you deserve. Believe me. You got this!
Therapy & Coaching at Essence of Healing Counseling Services
Roberta Alves is a Therapist and Development Coach at Essence of Healing Counseling, located in downtown Ft. Lauderdale, FL. She is also a Certified Anxiety Specialist who uses the solution focused and evidence based therapy called cognitive behavioral therapy. Research has shown that cognitive behavioral therapy is proven to be extremely effective in treating anxiety and improving self-esteem. Roberta provides counseling services to her clients who live in Ft. Lauderdale and the surrounding South Florida areas in her office in downtown. If you want to learn proven techniques to overcome stress, improve your self-esteem, and achieve your goals, call (954) 526-4006 to schedule an appointment today.